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Raul Reyes’ Miracle Laptop inexplicably survived a scorched earth bombing campaign over the weekend, and now humanity must find a new way to destroy it before it implicates us all. ABC News revealed all the terrible, terrible details from the thirteen documents the Colombian government made public last night, and we are all going to rot in The Hague. Details after the jump!
What The Laptop Said
>>> Apparently FARC leadership had ongoing contact with the highest levels of the Venezuelan government, and that the rebels believe that Chavez shares their goal of “discrediting” Alvaro Uribe. Perhaps a clandestine, criminal “discrediting”?>>> The rebels refer to a “dossier” which the Colombian government knows is code proving decisively that Venezuela provided hundreds of millions of dollars to the terrorists!
>>> The French were also secretly and frequently in contact with the dreaded FARC leaders, and a diplomatic meeting with an envoy called “Noe” was in the works.
>>> The Italians too were negotiating with them and brokering talks between the FARC and the entire European Parliament.
>>> Ecuador was in high level contacts with the FARC and brokering talks with the United States of America.
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